the problem is that it' so fucking random, at least for me. Three years of relatively depression-free living and then blam, it's back. I know, stressful situations can trigger it. I know, it's like asthma, I'm not at fault, i didn't do anything to deserve it, I'm not a bad person yadda yadda yadda. That doesn't help, especially with the anxiety part. When the handphone rings and I just wanna dump it in the toilet because i just. don't. fucking. want. to. deal. with whoever/whatever is on the other side. And every ring sends my blood pressure and heart rate higher until I think i'm gonna scream. or keel over. or both.
one should not be afraid of one's handphone. that is not a rational reaction.
I think I need to up my dosage.