Some of you may not know, not having been fully conscious during the eighties due to massive drug/alcohol intake or because you were still in diapers, but let me assure you that Christmas was better in the nineteen eighties.
For those of you who know, shed a tear and raise a glass for what has been lost to time. For those who don't, try not to let the knowledge that you will never experience a 1980s Christmas ruin what shallow joy is to be had in these latter days.
Also, George Michael and Andrew Ridgely get together for a drink. Wham!
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Do not say, "Why were the old days better than these?" For it is not wise to ask such questions. Ecc7:12.
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