My New Favorite Word

(Lifted from a rough draft of a FAQ I was recently editing. No, I didn’t come up with the word myself. I’m just not that cool.)

“Q: What happens to my unused loyalty points when my membership expires?

A: Upon expiry of the membership, a member has one month from date
of membership expiry to fully utilise the remaining points. After which, all the
unused points will be automatically zerolised. (emphasis mine)”

I cannot adequately express how much I love this new word. From now on, milk is not expired, it is zerolised. Ditto any vouchers/coupons/etc. In fact, let’s do away with boring words like ‘divorced’ or ‘terminated’ or ‘retrenched’.

“How’s the wife, Frank?”
“Oh, didn’t you hear? She zerolised me three months ago.”
“Gee, that’s tough.”

In fact, on my tombstone I don’t want boring born and died dates. Instead, I want “Utilized” and “Zerolised”.

God, this word rocks.